Private Pain

Tameka Jefferson


There's a pain in me that runs
very deep.
It's private, though I share it
with every Black Woman
It's the hurt in my heart I feel
when I'm looked over by what
Seems to be the world.

It's the Pain of knowing I'm thought
To be poorly educated and Socially
inferior
It's the Pain of dealing with Instructors
and personnel that don't have time,
look over me, and treat me
unfairly because they're impatient
and don't care .
It's Almost unbearable when that
Person is Sometimes Black

It's the Pain of Seeing Our men
die violently in the streets, and
the frustration of not knowing
what to do to stop it

It's the deep Pain of Seeing a Black
man who doesn't recognize me
for my Beauty and Worth.
The Pain you cause me by
Constantly trying to show me
That I'm not light enough

Or that my skin isn't fair enough,
and that my hair isn't Blonde
enough To Stand by you as
your trophy, your sign of accomplishment
your pride, your Supreme and only Woman
It's the Pain of Seeing and feeling
you deny me -- I'm a part of you
To deny my worth is to deny
your worth and all that you
are as a Black man.

The Pain I feel to remind you
"I" am the mother of your race
I'm your true backbone and Support
I stood by you for over four-hundred
years as a Slave --
and I will continue To Stand by you
for Over four-hundred more as
a Black American.
Without me our race will cease
To Exist . "I" am your Queen

I'll continue to bear this Pain
This is my private pain not Seen
by the World when you look into
my eyes -- but felt in the heart of
every Black woman born to bear
my race -- Sometimes I'm forced
To Carry on alone -- but I'll
forever Stand Strong.



Copyright 1995 Kaleidoscope. Write Place. Volume 6.
Contributors retain all rights to their work.
URL: http://leo.stcloud.msus.edu/kaleidoscope/volume6/page18.html